There was laughter, on both sides of the phone. Arrangements were made. Dates and times.
Locations.
“It’ll be fun. You should come. Everyone wants to see you again.”
***
Edgar was lost.
Everywhere looked the same. There were no landmarks and no one to ask.
There wasn’t even a map. He’d googled.
It felt like he’d been stuck there for days but he knew.
It’d been much longer.
***
The night of the party, Ed put on his face. He swapped out his eyes for the sparkling ones; changed his mouth for the one with the easy smile.
He dressed in silence. He’d been alone long enough to not need to speak to himself. Even his internal monologue had stopped.
He tried out some faces with the clothes he chose, and allowed himself one word.
“Shave.”
He wanted to pull his old mohawk out the bag, but that really needed two.
***
Shower, shave, face and clothes done, he flopped onto his sofa. He didn’t want to go, tonight. He wanted to make an excuse, any excuse. But he’d promised people.
He stared at the clock and wasn’t the slightest bit surprised when an hour had passed.
In a pervious life he’d have jumped up, ran from the door.
In this one he sighed, pulled on his coat and left quietly.
The party was in full swing when he got there. A drink was shoved into his hand and he was pushed into the melee. He slipped it onto a passing surface and went in search of something less Beer, more wine.
“Ed! You came!” A hug here. A kiss there. Had he been out of circulation that long? As he thought about it he supposed he had. Cornered, he finally accepted a drink – mixer. Strong. Tasted like petrol, so not the best vodka, but it was a start – and listened to the news he’d missed. And what news! He laughed, sympathised, hugged and kissed with the best of them.
***
He’d tried following set paths but they gave out on him. So – he’d set his sight on something on the horizon and made for that.
But it wasn’t a fixed point. It moved across the horizon – sometimes to the left – sometimes to the right. But it got no closer.
It was always out of reach.
So he turned and tried to back track. Get back to where he started and move from there, but he’d wandered for so long he couldn’t tell where that was.
He decided to draw a line. To call where he was Point A. To move out from there.
Which was when the fog rolled in.
***
“So. Tell me, Ed. What happened in…”
He was sharing in a chair in a corner of the chill room with… someone.
Had she told me her name yet? Did I know her from before and just couldn’t remember?
He started his story. One listener became 2, became 4. Soon he had the room listening, laughing, gasping. He grinned, winked, paused to drink, perfectly and then –
With his story was over, the crowd disappeared and Ed was left to his own devices. Namely, another drink.
“That was a great story. Any more where that came from?”
She was beautiful. He looked at her and played the future in his head.
They’d date, sleep together. It’d be fine. They’d get comfortable. And then she’d notice he wasn’t who she thought he was. He wasn’t the guy in the corner telling stories, or the guy on the dance floor. And she’d start to move away, to distance herself.
And he’d notice she wasn’t Her. And he’d try not to compensate, but he knew he’d be restless. Want to leave.
He looked down into his drink. Back up at her with a sad smile.
“A couple. But I only do one a party.”
“What about,” she stepped closer. “After the party?”
***
The fog cleared around him. Enough that he could lay down his hat. Pitch a tent.
Stop wandering.
It was that easy.
***
He looked over her shoulder, to the horizon and remembered when he could see so far.
“Not..not tonight. I have an early start tomorrow. Sorry. But, I’m always around. Do ask me again.”
***
The fog rolled right back in.
***
It was late when Edgar got home. He closed the door, stepped from his clothes and fell into bed within 10 paces.
During the night his face would fall off, and he’d awake lost, with his dull eyes and flat mouth.
But he’d dream.
He’d dream of the horizon.
